Thursday, March 17, 2005

Forget Viagra, gimme Jilas.

adver_tisingtv_mediaAnd now, the latest addition to the series of television ads that disturb me - the Jila commercial.

Has anyone seen this? More importantly: has anyone seen this and actually bought a packet of Jila mints afterwards?

The scenario: an attractive young couple are getting frisky in bed. Perhaps they're newlyweds? Or forbidden lovers stealing a brief moment of passion together? Whatever it is, they're going for it. The excitement builds as the hunky young spunk makes his advances (a bit of groping, namely) and then...

"Sorry," he says, ashamed (and yet strangely, still rather self-satisfied...)

As he falls asleep (ashamedly) on his love's lap, she rolls her eyes and quickly grabs her box of Jila mints from the bedside table and pops one into her mouth with a look on her face akin to ecstasy, while the smarmy voice over says "Jila mints are covered with layer upon layer of mint shell, so at least something will stay hard all night".

Well excuse me. All this time we've been under the illusion that Viagra is the perfect pill for a passion pick me up. Looks like we got it wrong. Personally, I think it would have done her better to forget the Jilas and just grab her box, but this is Ad Land, where reality is but a distant memory and mints are a satisfactory replacement for an orgasm.


"Hey baby, got any Jilas? Cos I go like the clappers."


I don't know about anyone else out there, but I've never rolled over after a bad session and thought "Gosh, I could just murder a mint." Besides which - who WANTS a mint to stay hard all night? I just want fresh breath, I'm not taking up a new hobby here. What do you have to do, stick it to the bedpost to continue in the morning?

Who came up with this cracker of a commercial? My guess is some hackneyed 80s ad exec who still believes "sex sells" and that if you get enough women collectively laughing at the same pathetic man, eventually they'll buy some mints.

If they HAD to go with a sex theme, they should have read the suggestions on this bulletin board. Everyone knows there's a better way to use a Jila when it comes to making things stay hard in the mouth.



2 comments :

  1. Hasn’t that been a marketing ploy for the past decade or two? Portray men as pathetic, weak and inept, and then watch as the women clamour around the water cooler to discuss that “hilarious” advert they saw last night? There must be lots of 30-40 year old divorcees with bad breath out there… well, judging from those I’ve seen discussing such adverts.

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  2. erm you write to much in your spare time. maybe its just i cant read that much in my spare time. i do love your work. tonight, there is too much to read, id is veeeeeeeeeeery funny tho. xx

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