Sunday, April 23, 2006

Salad of disappointment

misc_rantsSo I'll just get straight into this - I bought a bag of salad from the supermarket the other day (incidentally, it was the Port Adelaide Coles that has three aisles of thongs) and although the bag said 'Salad Fresh Greek Salad' I'd suggest a more appropriate label might read 'Salad? What Salad?'

THIS is what I'm talking about:


Salad of disappointment.

Hey hey HEY! Go easy on the onion there, Salad Fresh! Don't want to go overboard! Two slices is PLENTY for a salad. And three cherry tomatoes? Yeah, that should be enough.

Scene in the Salad Fresh packing line:

SALAD PACKER 1: Hey Wal, how much salad have we got in that bag?
SALAD PACKER 2: Uh, quite a bit actually Shane. The bag's pretty full.
SALAD PACKER 1: Hmm, it's supposed to be a GREEK salad though. Better chuck in that bit of onion that fell on the floor.
SALAD PACKER 2: I've got some left over tomatoes from me sandwich today, I'll give 'em a wash and throw them in too.


Complete...rip off.

Call me crazy, but I'd expect a 'complete salad kit' to contain A COMPLETE SALAD. If you actually made this according to the instructions on the pack (and yes, there ARE instructions on the back, which sort of gives away Salad Fresh's intended demographic - too fucking stupid to a) know how to assemble a salad and b) realise they're getting ripped off) I'd suggest you'd end up with something resembling a poorly decorated pile of lettuce. NOT A SALAD.

Note to Salad Fresh: A SACHET OF DRESSING AND A TEASPOON OF OLIVES DOES NOT A SALAD KIT MAKE.

PS: thanks to the lovely Graham Catt for mentioning me and Bland Canyon in the SA Writers' Centre newsletter this month. If you're interested in writing, you should check out his blog and their website....

PPS: to the freako Chariot user in Ballarat who came to the BC after searching for '12 year old tits pics' on Alta Vista - shame, shame, shame. Everyone knows Alta Vista is shit.



3 comments :

  1. Isn't Statcounter wonderful?

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  2. i once saw anne wills (? sp) at the coles in the markets buying about 8 packets of their pre made'ceasar salad'. All of the little plastic bags went in bigger plastic bags, and her car was parked out the front - of course.

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