In case you hadn't noticed, the 1990s are back in fashion again. Everyone's wearing high waisted coloured jeans and Converse sneakers and Wayfarer sunnies, worrying about AIDS* and reminiscing about cassette tapes they've never actually used but have heard their mums and dads talking about. (*may not actually be true.)
Sadly it seems the only '90s relic that hasn't yet been resurrected is decent rock music, so we're all stuck listening to Gotye and Lana Del Rey while the Red Hot Chili Peppers try and work out how to stop being shit.
Once all the 20-somethings realise how drastically awful crochet is, how bodysuits really don't flatter everyone and how Doc Martens don't actually go with everything, I'm sure the trend will die out. But in the meantime I figured I might as well jump on the '90s bandwagon and try to discover what the new generation finds so entrancing about this glorious decade of my youth by reliving it - through episodes of Beverly Hills 90210.
I was 10 when Beverly Hills 90210 premiered in 1990, and about 14 when Brenda left and it turned crap. I remember it being a fast-paced, dramatic show with a tight script and smart, cool characters who always looked trendy.
I was wrong.
It is slow. GOD, HOW IT'S SLOW. Seventy per cent of the first episode is made up of characters looking quizzically at each other, and the script moves at such a glacial pace your nanna could complete a marathon twice before anyone says anything to advance the storyline.
Also: Everyone basically looks terrible, which doesn't do much to explain why the fashion trends have come back but is good for a laugh.
Other things I discovered while watching 90210:
- Andrea is even weirder than you remember,
- Steve is really kind of cool,
- Brandon is way cuter than Dylan,
- Brian Austin Greene is the only one who actually looked like a high school student.
So to celebrate both the '90s and the 25th anniversary of the '90s-est of all digital picture formats, the GIF, I have decided to write a weekly* Beverly Hills 90210 episode recap: IN GIF FORMAT.
Go forth and read EPISODE ONE.
(*we'll see how long this lasts)